Relationship Building Part Three. Consistency Wins the Day

Continuing the last two posts on consistency, we recently worked on our two day course with a mare who benefited greatly once boundaries were established. Everything within horsemanship is linked, each aspect leading to another like doors which must not only be opened but passed through. This little mare had doors which had never been opened during her entire life and those that were, were quickly closed again without going in to sort out what was buried inside.

There were two main doors which she used as a means of escape. She could either push her way out by the front, or know instinctively how to evade through the back. Her house, let’s use our imagination for minute, was unstructured and disorganised to the point where she was insecure within it. People came and went, often leaving their children for her to entertain and look after. As a kind hearted soul, she tried very hard to oblige but a lot of the time she couldn’t find her coping mechanism manual or instruction kit amongst the clutter left by her visitors.

Another of her problems was that they were all so different, she didn’t know what to expect and most of them never told her what they wanted her to do. Eventually she gave up trying to work it out, and when it got too hot in the kitchen, she would shoot through either door and run around looking for alternative support.  

Her behaviour was often misunderstood; she has a bit of a reputation for unpredictability and bad manners. Whenever she gave a contrary opinion she was ticked off and even made to sit on the naughty step, which she couldn’t see the point of at all, and since no one could make her stay, she left as soon as she could.  Some might consider her a bit of a rebel, or a naughty pony but it wasn’t like that. She loved her visitors, especially her owner who had shown nothing but kindness after rescuing her in a moment of rashness from a dealer. 

As her only training had come from the school of hard knocks, she wasn’t into listening to her rider as the questions were confusing, and when she gave an answer, she was mostly rewarded with a tug and a pull. In her mind, escape was the only solution. Since she was built like a mini tank with a chest as wide as a bull, it was a very effective strategy that had always worked until the day her owner loaded her up and took her to MSC on a course.

I think it’s true to say we were all amazed by the progress and transformation in this little mare. Bolshy and pushy to begin with, she was sufficiently polite and attentive by the end of the first day to join all the activities on the second. How was that achieved? By leaving the door of consistency open to strict boundary definition and following through until the task was understood. When agreement was reached, instant security miraculously popped its head out of one of the windows which had been shut for so long everyone thought it was part of the wall. The little mare yawned, she liked the feeling of not having to take responsibility. Now that she’d stopped trying to get away, she saw another door she’d never noticed before. The door of choice was inviting her in. She could choose to continue life as she knew it or step into the room of release. You could see her thinking about that one.

Understanding all the benefits inside the door of release was a light bulb moment. Although the light flickered off and on, another door with several windows continued to deliver support throughout the day. As she got familiar with the sense of release, she began to feel its influence. Softness came in through the window and pressure went out of the door. 

The dust has been stirred to reveal openings containing interspecies maps hidden under layers of confused signals. Now the windows are opening, letting in the light of communication, understanding, and true connection. Both horse and owner can start afresh, taking consistent steps towards building a healthy trust based relationship. We are forward to receiving updates on her progress.

Relationship Building Part Two

In the last post we discussed relationship building and touched on the techniques for success. One of the biggest hurdles to overcome is lack of trust as it’s not easy to accurately determine what the levels are. A good indicator is how strong the boundaries are between you. Your horse may be all over you like a rash but that doesn’t necessarily mean he trusts you. How do we define trust? Trust is the absence of fear based reactions both on the ground and under saddle. What are the signs? When your horse is happy to stand still without being tied up or held onto. When your horse agrees to be ridden without sudden shying, running off at unexpected noises, or other unpredictable behaviour. Natural though these responses are, they mostly occur when a horse feels insecure or under threat which can be most of the time for some.

In order to change their perception of how life works, we must learn to be totally consistent with everything we do. We know horses are creatures of habit and a big part of that is their need for consistency which isn’t to be confused with routine. You can have a routine without consistency and consistency without routine. We prefer the latter because it gives us and the horses more flexibility and opportunity to build a relationship without restraints.  Where should you start with consistency? By consciously making sure you do everything in the same way and at the same speed of movement to obtain a particular result until it becomes a habit or ritual the horse can rely on. The horse is less concerned whether what you do is right or wrong but cares deeply about doing something one way today and another tomorrow. Your horse will find it easier to trust you when you consistently do the “wrong” thing all of the time than the “right” thing some of the time. If he can’t rely on you to be consistent, how can he trust you to keep him safe when you take him away from the herd?

As an example of how much value a horse places on consistency, let’s look at a typical situation out hacking where the horse sees something he doesn’t like and refuses to go past it. Maybe you feel it expedient to get off and lead him past. The next day he does the same thing. You try a little harder to persuade him to keep going but he says no and turns round. You bring him back and try again. He tells you he doesn’t think it’s a good idea and before you know it, he’s turned round again and is heading for home. You manage to get him back so he’s facing the “right” way and to avoid an argument, you dismount and lead him past. The next day you ride out with a friend whose horse just walks by and not surprisingly, your horse is happy to follow. The day after you are on your own again and even more determined to ride past the stumbling block. After a couple of attempts to turn round, he agrees to go past with a bit of a dash. You give him lots of pats and tell him he’s a good boy. The next time you ride him it’s very windy, he’s more jumpy than usual so you’re not surprised he won’t pass the dreaded “thing.” You don’t trust him to stand still long enough for you to get on again if you lead him past so you decide to take an alternative route. Time goes by with some improvement. There are days he goes by without a problem but on others, he flatly refuses and tries evasion tactics which make you feel nervous enough to either dismount or go another way.

What’s actually happening is that the horse has developed a rule to help him deal with a lack of consistency beyond dismounting with regard to riding past whatever it was that he didn’t like, even though by now it no longer poses a threat. Now he dictates whether or not he’ll go past, depending on how confident he feels on any particular day. The rule is he will follow you or another horse past or go on his own if he feels like it. The rule is not only consistent, it’s also a habit. Consistency is so important to horses that they will be inclined to put their own version in place in order to feel safe unless you can show you can step up to the mark.  

Trust through consistency is absolutely the best way to build a successful partnership.

Relationship Building

Relationships are tricky things at the best of times. If we look back on our life, most of us can remember falling out with a friend, a work colleague or even a family member. Relationships change over time; as the years pass, our needs can change or we look at things from a different perspective. The business of relationships in general is big and complex. Communicational difficulties between humans often need a professional mediator so what chance is there to enjoy a successful relationship with a non verbal being like a horse?

Many people admit to liking animals better than humans, finding it easier to relate to their pets. If asked why, they would come up with reasons like "Animals don't judge you, " or "He's always pleased to see me", or "He accepts me for what I am, I can be me". Although these statements also apply to horses, on their own they are not enough. The difference between a horse and a dog for instance, is the latter relies on his owner completely for food, shelter, and companionship while horses never truly lose their wild heritage. Their need for safety and survival is so great, the instinct to return to the herd is overriding, even stronger than the desire for food.

A good relationship with your horse is determined by its health. Just like human relationships, not all are positive.  Horses are individuals with a group mentality; it is easier to form a bond with some than others depending on character and previous conditioning. Sadly most horses have multiple owners throughout their life which inevitably means they will collect some baggage over time that not only affect their performance, but also their ability to relate positively to humans.

We all know a healthy relationship is based on trust. Trust has to be earned.  It can’t be bought, forced or demanded. It is totally dependent on the horse feeling safe and secure. These feelings can change in an instant, they might be present one minute and gone the next as we all know. Horses only feel safe and secure while their survival isn’t under threat. Being absolutely consistent in riding and handling them with an aura of calm, assertive energy, giving them enough time to work out what we want them to do, allows trust to develop naturally. One of the best indicators of your horse’s trust levels is how happy he is to simply stand still without being constrained.

Since this might bring up more questions than answers, next time we will explore some simple techniques for relationship success.

Horses are Great Teachers, a guest post from Sam

I have now had 2 separate horses from Avril and the initial story for each has been the same. As a mum returning to riding 20 years after my last serious experiences with it, and then not very good, I have all the usual associated problems – not fit, not competent, and not confident. And even today I have little confidence and need a horse I am sure will not bolt, reverse into a ditch or spook into the oncoming traffic. I also carry my own neuroses – that any horse I will ride will not be as good for me as it is for Avril; that I may “ruin” a horse; and that I am not good enough to tell the difference between a horse that is testing boundaries and one that doesn’t understand what I am asking – because I am not asking correctly or mis-reading what it is telling me.

This background lead to the arrival of Oxo – one of Avril’s own ponies about whom I have written previously. It has since been followed by the arrival of Puzzle who’s role is to temporarily cover Oxo’s role while Oxo is resting from some surgery.

In both cases I have approached them with both terror and excitement – excitement that this might be the pony that will take me on quiet, gentle, peaceful hacks around the farm, allowing me to watch the swifts insect-diving in the ripening wheat. But the terror has been the prevailing emotion – and of course the one I share with the horses, and for which they end up having to take responsibility, in looking after me.

The first obvious consequence of this terror, combined with the horse being in an entirely new environment starts when I try to get on a pony which has not moved off from the mounting block without its rider in 10 years but because I am telling it so strongly that this is highly dangerous, it chooses to do so. Oxo did this for my first 4 or 5 rides, and on our first ride went marching out of the yard the minute I was on. For Puzzle, where I was slightly less terrified but not much she did this for our first ride. But as a (nearly) old hand at this I realized that I had to a) get a better grip on my nerves and b) just keep, patiently telling her that I needed her to stand still. After 5 or 6 circuits of the mounting block she stood still, including once I was on, and sorting out my stirrups. On our second ride she stood perfectly still straightaway and there was less fuss. Whether this was because I had reduced my fear after a lovely hack the day before, or because I had insisted the day before I don’t know – but of course the minute it happens then the virtuous circle on the confidence front commences. Since then we have had a couple of times moving off, usually after I haven’t ridden for a couple of days, but as my confidence in her, and in asking her to stand has grown it becomes less and less an issue. Certainly with Oxo it is an issue I had forgotten ever existed after a year of riding her.

My second challenge has been that both horses are perfectly patient and will wait while out, if you chat to a passer-by, want to let a dog be caught etc. Except that neither will with me – they want to pace a bit – I think because standing still is dangerous, especially when your rider is telling you there is trouble out there. With Oxo this was more of a problem because I was (even) more of a novice. So I started by asking her for 2 or 3 second stops on the outward trip and over time built up to 5 or 10 second stops, and then added in doing these on the way home, including even within spitting distance of the yard. Now she stands without me thinking about it – this is not something I have taught her because when I first rode her at Avril’s she stood perfectly when out – it is something she has now understood is ok to do with me even though I am exhibiting fear. For Puzzle exactly the same experience has emerged – and again I rode her a couple of times at Avril’s and it was not a feature there. So I know it is something about me which is making it happen. For Puzzle I now know enough not to just pull on the reins if she tries to walk on, so I ask her to walk round in a circle and then stand which has worked. I am also confident that as I relax the issue will go away – but until we have got to know each other I wont ask her to stand at road junctions etc.

For Puzzle the other manifestation was initially a real marching walk – not a run, and no hint of a jog, but a striding out that was the most purposeful I have ever felt. But again, literally by day 2, Puzzle had settled her walk (though it is a naturally very forward going walk, but I now also know it wont speed up or break into a trot, even when ridden on the buckle). It was the same with her trot – which the first time was more of a run, the second was less so and now is a very ground covering trot – which is the norm for Puzzle but with no hint of speeding up, and instant downward transitions (which also caught me out the first time I experienced it!)

After this the two ponies are different – Oxo has done the odd spook but only when she has been caught by surprise – a herd of deer moving through the woods when she could only catch glimpses of them was the most extreme – it involved a leap to one side and kicking out with her back feet. Initially this completely threw me because I thought it was a buck – even though it didn’t unseat me at all, and has never been seen since. This was in our first week and since then she has mostly just muscle twitched if something, like a pheasant, has leapt out of the hedge. But even then its only if she is caught by surprise. Now her muscle twitching is her only real spooking.

Puzzle told me of her nerves in a different way – she called and called the first hack we did together. I found this disconcerting but knew to keep her head straight and just tell her that we were going to continue out all the way until we got home. On our second hack she called twice and I haven’t heard her call at all since. Again this is not something I heard her do at Avril’s, and isn’t typical of her.

So I guess what I have taken from these experiences is that if we show our horses a lot of nerves they will show us some back – because they would not be remotely tuned into us if they didn’t and they are animals which survive on reading the body language of those around them. And that has lead me to conclude that with a new horse the first week will not necessarily be like the subsequent weeks and they may well show some small lapses in their perfect behaviour in the face of being at a new yard, different routine, different companions and a nervous rider.

With both horses I have done things in a way some would describe as particularly hard – I have spen my first few weeks hacking out alone. I have done this because I know that is what Avril’s horses are used to, and also so that I don’t have to worry about their reaction to any other horses, or the behavior of any other horses, and can just concentrate on me and my horse. I also feel that if I can do that then everything else will be easier later, including that I wont have to worry about finding a riding companion – and that is how it has proved to be. For me there is little that is more glorious than being on a horse, on my own, on a long rein, watching the wildlife ignore me!

Sam

Mastering "Natural" Horsemanship

We feel this post, an article by Ron Meredith is most relevant to owners and riders alike. Horsemanship is as much a journey in self-discovery as it is in learning new or established techniques. With many valuable tips and strategies to remind you of what your horse needs to feel comfortable with you. If they could speak in words, I'm sure they would say it is easier to listen to us when we take the time to ensure we are a are a clear channel of communication.

Most people think you control a horse by controlling its head. You put on a lead rope or a bridle and you use that to show the horse how you want him to start and stop and turn and move his feet and disengage this or that and other stuff. So how do you control a horse when you don’t have a lead rope or a bridle on him? Every day, there are a lot of people chasing horses around in pastures asking that question.

A horse-logical training system like heeding teaches people how to control the horse’s mind. If you’ve got his mind, you’ve got the horse whether or not he’s loaded with tack. It takes a very specific discipline to learn to do this correctly. I don’t mean discipline in the sense of obedience or punishment. When I use the word discipline, I mean calm compliance. It takes discipline or self control on the part of the trainer to make the horse into a disciple or follower, to cause the horse to willingly follow your lead.

In the animal kingdom, humans are predators and horses are prey animals. In order to work with horses, we have to figure out how to bridge that zoological gap. We do this by establishing a pattern, a feeling in the horse, that we are the safest, most comfortable place in the world to be rather than a predator out to do them harm. It is simple to describe how to do this but hard to master the program. Here are the ground rules:

Pay attention. You get the horse to pay attention to you by paying constant attention first to yourself, then to the horse. Say hello to your friends at the stables, scratch all the dogs and shoot the breeze with the yard manager before you head down the aisle to get your horse, not while you’re with him. Don’t forget to turn off the radio or put the compact disk player and ear buds away.

In order to pay full attention to what you are doing and what your horse is doing, you have to put any distractions aside. You need to focus and concentrate. If that’s hard for you, start with 10 minutes and work your way up. Eventually you want to be so focused on your horse that you wouldn’t notice if a bomb went off or someone came up alongside you waving a million pound check.

Pay attention to what you are thinking, to what you are doing, and to how you are breathing. If you’re thinking about what kind of pizza you want for dinner, you’re not with your horse. If you’re thinking about how your horse is going to perform at next week’s show, you’re not with your horse right now. Keep monitoring your attention and bringing it back to your horse.

As you are paying attention to your horse, ask yourself what kind of feedback he’s giving you? How is he breathing? What are his eyes and his ears signalling? Are his reactions to haltering, leading, grooming or whatever you’re doing with him the same as the last time you worked with him?

If you are paying attention to your horse, you will know when his attention wanders from you. You don’t jerk on the lead rope or spank or poke him. You don’t “correct” him or punish him. You just quietly do the smallest thing you need to do to get his attention back on you. It might be as little a brushing your hand against your nylon jacket to make a little noise or as much as using some sort of pressure that makes him move his feet a little. It’s going to vary from horse to horse and it will change as the horse spends more time with you.

The most important things to pay attention to are rhythm and relaxation. You start moving rhythmically from the moment the horse can hear your voice or footsteps or sees you coming toward his stall. Everything about your approach should be rhythmic and relaxed. Pay attention to your breathing because that’s where it starts. Then pay attention to every movement you make and the tension in your muscles, even your face.

As you greet the horse in his stable, put on his halter, stand him in the aisle, start grooming, tack him up, or whatever you’re doing that day, you work with a constant sense of rhythm. From the way you buckle the halter to the way you coil the end of the lead to the way you pick up and put down your brushes or lay the saddle pad on the horse’s back you don’t speed up, you don’t slow down, and you don’t let things get jerky or jittery. Rhythm. Rhythm. Rhythm.

Move your horse to the arena with rhythm, mount with rhythm, and ride with rhythm. Rhythm is the mother of relaxation and teaching your horse that pattern can help prevent a wreck down the road someday when something unusual and unplanned happens. And it will.

Never raise the excitement level to a predatory level. Keeping yourself rhythmic and relaxed will help you keep your wits and your patience so you never do anything that startles the horse. Never do anything that interrupts the feeling you want him to have that you are a safe place to be. If something you do elevates the excitement level, you put too much pressure on the horse. If you do something and he didn’t notice it, you need to go back and repeat the lessons about paying attention until you both have that down.

Here’s an example. If you are constantly paying attention to the horse you will be constantly aware of what he’s thinking and doing. You will start to catch little things before they escalate into big things. You will start to control your own reactions so that you can control the horse’s reactions. For instance, let’s say you have a horse in a round pen and something startles him and he leaves. You don’t react to his leaving by increasing the pressure and asking him for a few extra laps of the pen. That’s retribution and you are not trying to establish the pattern that if the horse leaves when you didn’t tell him to leave, he’s going to get punished for that.

Instead, if something unusual grabs his attention and raises his excitement level to the point that he needs to leave, you just let him go and act like nothing happened. Then you have to get his attention back before you can do anything else. So you do the smallest thing you need to do to get his attention back on you. Then you invite him to come back to you. Repeat. Repeat. Repeat. After awhile when something startles him, he’ll start checking to see what you’re doing before he leaves. If you keep acting like nothing happened, he’ll start to follow your lead and act that way, too.
Repeat these steps until you figure it out. You have to work on paying attention, staying rhythmic and staying relaxed until your self control is a pattern the horse can absolutely trust. Then you can be in control of your horse.

Don’t be surprised if everything doesn’t just fall neatly in place the first day or week or even for several months when you start learning a non-predatory way of being horses. Some call it “natural” horsemanship but it doesn’t come naturally to a lot of people. Developing the mental self control that enables you to control a horse is hard work. A lot of the old horsemen teaching this took a lifetime to learn it. If you’re younger than they are, don’t get discouraged. Take your time and be as patient with yourself as you want to be with your horse.

Relationship Building

Regular readers of our blog will know that Briar has her own page where this update is can also be found. Her story is so inspiring, we've feel it is more than worthy of being front page news!

Briar came home to us a week ago and so I thought it was time for an update.... I know I have thanked you many times already but I have to thank you again because Briar is such a star . . Its been a long process but it has soooooo been worth it after what I have been witness to this week... tears in my eyes wouldnt quite cover it!

Briar came home a little earlier than expected as she had a perculiar health turn not really poorly as such but showing some symtoms that needed attention.. I treat homeopathically and for that reason she needed to be home so she could be watched as remedies need to altered depending on the change in symptoms.. I would like to take this opportunity to say that she has been looked after impeccably by my friends and  they were sad to see her leave it was really hard as they were so kind to drop her to us to what will be our new home very soon ..and their daughter cried as she said goodbye...... my friend told me it hit her when she looked across the field the next day and the little black cob wasnt there.. I tell you this little black mare touches hearts

During the last week Briar has had two Shiatsu sessions which were very revealing paticulaly the last one as she finds it hard to give of her self to these kind of treatmensts and actually to begin with was quite grumpy and unhappy about it all but eventually she secumbed to the gentle treatment and was enthralling with her muzzle nestled in Jeans face as she worked on meridian points in her face.. she carries a lot of anger ( not surprising really as she tries to keep being with us and I keep sending her off elsewhere BUT no more)this shows physically in pain behind the saddle and Avril found her sore here before so it is an area that definately needs keeping an eye on..

Lottie has been so patient desperate to sit on but knowing that Briar had to feel well and not in pain.. so she took to just sitting in her stable as often as she could... I went to check on them, crept quietly over so not to disturb  and there was Lottie sat on the floor legs out, back against the wall talking to Briar about her name and would she mind if she changed it as she felt that Briar was such a spiky sounding name and Briar was no longer a spiky person .. so she wondered if she could call her by her other name Ebony which means  dark strength .. Briar I have to tell you was stood over Lotties legs with her head down and falling asleep ... it was so so wonderful to see..her stable is very big and she could have chosen to stand anywhere but Lottie told me later she walked over and chose to stand with her..  Later on I asked Lottie how she would know what Briar felt about her name.. and she just said Briar is thinking about it... so will let you know when Briar lets Lottie know!

Lottie is very strict about following what she learnt on one of Avrils courses and from day one made Briar walk behind her and stop when asked... I say made as if it was an issue but with Lottie it just isnt she walks quietly behind and the paddock she is in is about 1/3 of mile away from the stables and  Briar never  moves from being behind... I have more trouble and I am certain it is because I find it harder to empty my head of junk whereas  Lottie seems able to totally focus...what was so funny /humbling in witnessing was a few days ago was the following... Lottie was leading Briar to the field and at a road junction put her arms out for Briar to stop and stand.. Briar immediately stopped but everso sweetly and slowly raised her head and just stretched her neck out without taking a step forward to rest her chin on Lotties outstretched arms... Lottie could hardly breathe at this gesture which is quite something from Briar.. so they just stood Lottie with outstretched arms and Briar resting her chin but never moving a hoof... what the traffic thought goodness knows!!

As Briars back ceased to be sore Lottie excitedly asked if she could ride her out to the field... I think that will be fine i said..  was she tacked ? no.. bridle maybe? no!... she jumped on bareback with a headcoller and reins and off we went.. Lottie in front and me behind leading her field companion... I have been waiting so long to see Lottie enjoying her pony like kids should but never did i think that pony would be Briar.. but hey what do I know about getting the right pony!!lol

Well the real tester was today and i cant help it but try as i could to be chilled i was in bits inside and i told Briar so... Lottie was taking her out on a hack on her own in a bitless Bridle .... She tacked up calmly stood like a rock to be mounted and off they went round the yard a bit.. she did a couple of halts to see if she felt ok which they both did so out the gate to explore..... I tried so hard to get on with other jobs and trust in Briars honourable nature and Lotties abilility... but I am afraid I am a mother and after 15minutes could stand it no longer and jumped into the car to casually ( ha ha ha not so casual inside!!) drive passed and check all was well.. gosh they looked so great together loose reins ears pricked and the biggest wave from Lots.. the sun was shining .. it was just one of those perfect moments... well I am so sad to say that i was intending to drive round the block back home but i just found the car couldnt help itself and it had this deep need to do a three point turn and casually drive passed again but from the other direction!!! of course  all was still well but instead of the entusiastic wave i got that look from Lottie that was saying what on earth are you doing you mad person go home we are fine! so i did .. and yes they arrived safely home .. Lottie high fived me later this evening .. its been a long time coming but truly we have finally arrived... we are very blessed...

I raise a glass of chilled wine to Avril and MSC dream makers extraordinaire!  x x x x x

Horse Training From The Ground Up

Have you ever wondered what your horse was thinking? Have you ever asked yourself ``Why doesn't he listen to me?'' or ``Why did he do that?'' Well did you ever stop to think that your horse may be asking those very same questions?

The three principles of the Horse/Human Relationship are Trust, Respect, and Communication. These principles have a priority in the horse's mind. If you try to get respect, or communicate with the horse before he trusts you, you will trigger the flight/fight instinct in the horse and he will run away, mentally if not physically.

The normal response to this is to restrict the horse's choices with cross ties, draw reins, martingales, etc. We prefer techniques that allow the horse to make choices, and then tell him when he makes the right one. This teaches the horse to respond to a request, rather than react to a stimulus. Most people never ask the horse what he thinks, because they're afraid he'll give the wrong answer. There's nothing wrong with the horse making a mistake (that's how he learns) as long as you let him know it was a mistake.

Trust is the first and most important priority in the horse/human relationship. Most people can gentle a horse but few earn his trust. In the horse's mind, gentleness is the horse not hurting us, trust is not hurting the horse. Therefore, trust allows the horse to step out of his comfort zone and expand his knowledge and experience.

Respect is to consider worthy of high regard and has nothing to do with fear or intimidation. Though closely intertwined, it differs from trust in that it helps define the relationship within the herd. Trust gives the horse confidence to act, respect motivates him to.

Communication is a process by which information is exchanged through a common system of symbols, signs or behaviour. The horse's language is a physical one of position and gestures, reinforced with verbal expression...just the opposite of ours. It is incumbent upon us to learn his language, and not expect him to learn ours. Many people believe the horse moves away from pressure. If that were true, try to pull a head down that hasn't been taught to lower it, or push him off a toe when he's standing on it. The horse learns to move away from pressure to seek a release. This is where feel, timing, and balance become critical. Feel allows us to recognize when the horse is responding (or thinking of responding). Timing the release tells the horse when he has responded correctly. Balance keeps us in position to feel the horse respond and time the release.

Whether interacting with humans or horses, the principles of a relationship remain the same, all that changes are the values of the individuals and the methods of communication. Treat your horse as you would your best friend, and he'll trust you as his herd leader. For both partners in the horse/human relationship, trust gives the freedom to act, respect motivates them to act, and communication tells them how to act.